Aquaviews - SCUBA Blog » Scuba Humor

Merry Christmas SCUBA Claus!

Creedence — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 19:54:46 +0000

Everyone knows that this is a big day for Santa, delivering toys and treats to all the good boys and girls of the world. But Santa doesn’t stop there; there are many other kinds of good girls and boys under the sea as well. Mrs. Claus was a bit curious about the happenings of Santa’s submarine deliveries, so she decided to come along for the ride. From all of us at LeisurePro, Merry Christmas and have a wonderful holiday!

Beware Underwater Pickpockets

Creedence — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 22:53:50 +0000

While many of us explore the depths for the peace, quite and serenity of the underwater world, many SCUBA divers don’t realize they have entered a whole new world of threats. Typically associated with packed metropolitan streets, pickpockets and muggers can be found in some of the most beautiful underwater environments too.

Probably one of the more famous and extreme cases of an underwater mugging, this octopus not only steals a camera, but when approached by his victim attempts to steal his speargun. New research shows the unknown intelligence of octopuses, but we can see their violent intentions by stealing weapons in this video.

Usually perceived as peaceful and majestic, no one would expect a manta ray to be behind an insidious plot to steal thousands of dollars worth of camera equipment. While the equipment was eventually recovered, the manta ray took it for a little bit of a joyride before dumping the merchandise.

Octopus and manta rays aren’t the only underwater animals who like to attempt to steal camera equipment. This time we have a shark “mistaking” a camera for food. We can safely assume the shark wanted to turn the cameras on the divers.

Divers aren’t the only ones who are the victims of thefts from below. In this video we have humpback whales stealing food from birds. With organized crime inspired coordination, the humpback whales coordinate their hunting efforts to steal from the disadvantaged birds on the surface.

Be careful on your next dive, the underwater world is full of opportunistic thieves!

For all of these instances of “theft” there are countless peaceful, amazing encounters. Our commentary is meant as humorous and you shouldn’t fear animals stealing your SCUBA gear!

Fun With Bubble Rings

Creedence — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 21:33:51 +0000

Blowing bubble rings is one of the more entertaining ways to pass the time underwater, and humans aren’t the only mammals that get a kick out of it. Cetaceans are actually quite adept at making bubble rings, and even appear to do it just for fun! It is thought that dolphins are able to perceive the bubbles with sonar, but research is still underway to determine why they make them in the first place, and if it is learned behavior or inherited ability. Whatever the answers to these questions may be, there can be no doubt that these creatures are masters of self-amusement!

SCUBA Diver Video: Octopus Steals Camera

Creedence — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 18:30:00 +0000

Some dive professionals who frequent waters populated by octopus refer to them as the “cats of the sea” (not to be confused with SCUBA cat). This description is based on their frequent curiosity but also short attention spans.

In the video below, a diver comes up on an octopus who takes an interested in his camera. The camera runs throughout the ordeal while the diver chases the octopus trying to recover his SCUBA gear. Eventually, the SCUBA diver in the video is able to entice the octopus away from the camera by offering his spear gun. Luckily, the octopus didn’t take the time to figure out the spear gun and let it go as well, leaving the SCUBA diver with some incredible video. Check it out:

Should you encounter a curious octopus while on a dive, hold your hand over your regulator and mask so the octopus doesn’t accidentally pull them off, then patiently wait for it to lose interest and swim away.

A Sea of Smiles

Creedence — Sun, 23 Oct 2011 01:18:59 +0000

Although these creatures don’t actually contract their facial muscles into smiles like humans do, they sure seem like they’re hamming it up for the camera, don’t they? We dare you not to smile back at these happy faces!

via Dan Hershman

via Just Taken Pics

via footloosiety

via Bob Owen

via Clicksy

via USFWS Endangered Species

via hoshner_sigmaniax

via jan-borgstede

via og2t // ou gee tew tee

Good Enough to Eat: 9 Fish Named After Common Foods

Creedence — Sun, 16 Oct 2011 02:01:52 +0000

We humans can be so weird when it comes to naming species, and it begs the question: do these animals really resemble the things we are naming them after, or is it purely for our own amusement? Maybe scientists got to naming these species on an empty stomach. There must be really scientific reasons for naming them after common foods…any guesses?

Pancake Batfish

via NOAA Photo Library

Lemon Shark

via pony_33406

Chocolate Chip Starfish

via Velo Steve

Yellow Tang

via laszlo-photo

Sea Cucumber

via Dan Hershman

Butter Sole

via Girl Interrupted Eating

Milkfish

via Dennis Wong

Oreo Dory

via NOAA Photo Library

Pumpkinseed Sunfish

via cliff1066™

3 Tell-Tale Marks of a SCUBA Nerd

Creedence — Thu, 22 Sep 2011 00:18:36 +0000

Every activity you could possibly be involved in on earth will have its nerds. That is to say, a person who is so obsessed with their hobby of choice that there is literally nothing they don’t know, and they relish the opportunity to gush, to anyone who will listen, anything and everything there is to know about the subject. They’re usually pretty easy to pick out of a crowd, based on a few identifying traits. Chances are pretty good you know at least one SCUBA nerd!

This article is just for fun, and in no way implies that people should not be passionate about what they love. Spread the SCUBA word.

Correction of Incorrect Terminology

You can’t always identify a SCUBA nerd just by seeing one, but keep your ears open and fingers crossed that someone not in tune with SCUBA says something silly out loud, like referring to fins as “flippers.” You will see a SCUBA nerd leap into action, at the ready with the correct word, and most likely a lengthy explanation of what the difference between the two is. This will also happen if a mask is called “goggles,” or air cylinders are referred to as “oxygen.” The chance that you will observe this behavior is even higher when using the internet, usually between a litany of insults, expletives, and bad spelling/grammar/punctuation.

Frequent Use of SCUBA Double Entendres

We’ve all heard them. The bad pick-up lines, the groaner jokes, the painfully obvious metaphors in the “witty” sayings. SCUBA nerds not only love saying them, they love displaying them. On a t-shirt, bumper sticker, towel, ball cap, you name it — if it’s got a phrase on it that brings to mind a creepy guy in a trench coat looking at naughty pictures, the SCUBA nerd will probably have it, and brandish it with pride. Do not laugh more than once at these phrases. It just eggs them on.

All Roads Lead to SCUBA

The avid SCUBA nerd will always be able to integrate SCUBA into the conversation, no matter how seemingly far off the subject it is. There is always something, someone, or somewhere that reminds them of a dive, and you’re about to hear every detail. This is a great time to suddenly come down with a bug, or get a dramatic phone call or text that will require you to leave abruptly. You’ve nothing to fear by leaving mid-story — there are plenty more where that one came from!

Original photos via BBM Explorer, robert_hornung, vortistic

It Wasn’t Me, It Was the Fish

Creedence — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 21:32:10 +0000

This is a rather interesting topic to be researching and writing about, as it probably wouldn’t have crossed my mind. This article comes as a result of consistently seeing a common search term that brings new readers to Aquaviews. Since it’s been awhile since we’ve covered the topic, and clearly the people still want to know, Aquaviews brings you the latest information to answer the question, “Do fish fart?”

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5 SCUBA Pick-Up Lines (That You Should Never, Ever Use)

Creedence — Thu, 11 Aug 2011 21:33:41 +0000

Whenever you meet another SCUBA enthusiast, there is some kind of unspoken bond between you, a certain connection that only those involved with SCUBA can share. But as in all situations in life, sometimes that common ground just isn’t enough for someone, and they have to take it a step further.

There really is nothing better than a good ol’ pick-up line, and the ones in this post are classic. These lines could result in any number of responses, given the variables of the situation in which they are used. Although they may strike one person’s funny bone, they could be downright offensive to another. The point is, if you must use them, use them with discretion.

*Aquaviews assumes no liability for the outcomes of the following pick-up lines.

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How Nit-Picky Are You?

Creedence — Sat, 09 Jul 2011 23:13:22 +0000

While SCUBA diving may soothe our inner beast, most people still can’t get away from pet peeves. However, if you ask two different divers about a certain hot-button diving topic, you will frequently receive two completely different viewpoints. Here are some of the most common topics we hear divers being nit-picky about.

Tank vs Cylinder

Technically speaking, the thing strapped to our back holding our breathing gas is a cylinder. But many people simply refer to it as a tank. Which do you prefer?

Flippers vs Fins

Again, the trained diver typically knows of the propulsion devices on our feet as fins, but the new diver sometimes refers to them as flippers. We’ve seen more than one marine biologist lecture on the finer nuances between flippers and fins.

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